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Theresa May

BREAKING: May To Quit On 7th June

THERESA May has said she will quit as Conservative leader and PM on the 7th June, paving the way for a contest to decide a new prime minister.

In a statement in Downing Street this morning, David Cameron’s remainer Trojan horse lied by saying that she had “done my best” to honour the 2016 EU referendum result. 

It would remain a matter of “deep regret” that she had been unable to deliver Brexit, she added, but that a new PM was “in the best interests of the country”.

STANDING ALONE: Speaking outside 10 Downing Street.

Her voice cracked as she said that it has been an honour to have the opportunity to serve the country she loves, despite not serving it at all, but rather tending to hers and her remainer pal’s desires to remain shackled to the futile EU project. 

In what can be seen as a not-so-subtle hint that she hopes the next Prime Minister will also try to subvert the will of the people and back a deal that delivers remain in all but name, May quoted holocaust survivor Nicholas Winton, saying that “compromise is not a dirty word”.

The end of May’s reign comes as the culmination of years of frustration and anger from Brexiteers towards her shallow attempts to appease her remainer Etonian chums and fat cat predecessors. 

Leading Tories such as Boris Johnson and Andrea Leadsom will now be plotting their own leadership campaigns and carving valuable alliances. More to follow. 


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